Heat ghee in a pan and fry black sesame seeds (lightly), roasted gram dal (till you get the roasted smell) and coconut bits (till it turns golden brown) separately.
Melt jaggery with 1/3 cup water and strain it.
Add grated coconut to this and cook on low flame. Cook till the jaggery reduces a bit and the mixture becomes a semi dry consistency.
Add aval and roasted ingredients to the coconut jaggery mixture. Cook on low flame for 3-4 mins, stir continuously. Remove from fire and keep stirring for 2-3 mins. Add crushed cardamom and mix well. Cover and keep for 20-25 mins.
You can eat it as it is or serve with banana.
Notes
Do a taste check of jaggery to assess the sweetness and adjust the qty accordingly.Make sure not to cook the mixture for long after adding Aval, overcooking may harden the Aval.If you want, you can add 1-2 tsp of ghee while cooking jaggery and coconut mixture.Once it is cooled completely, you can store it in an airtight container in fridge for a month or so. Keep at room temp for 25-30 mins before serving or MW for a min or so. You can also store it at room temp in an airtight container for 2-3 days.